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Opinion: The human face of church’s lack of respect


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By Brian Cahill

I am a Catholic who voted against Proposition 8 in 2008 and contributed $1,000 to the No on 8 Campaign, a Catholic who is sustained by regular Mass, scripture and prayer. I am also the father of a gay son, from whom I was slow to learn how painful, debilitating and denigrating are the constant legal and social reminders that he and those like him are not fully accepted members of the human community.

In their statement supporting Prop. 8, the California Catholic Bishops declared that marriage is “intrinsic to stable, flourishing and hospitable societies.” Ironically, this is one of the compelling reasons gay and lesbian couples wish to be joined in civil marriages. They are seeking a structure and context for their love, commitment, fidelity and mutual support.

Many believe that the ideal for children is to be raised by a mother and a father, yet we know what the divorce rate is among heterosexual couples. We know there are 75,000 children in the California foster care system, a quarter of them waiting to be adopted. We know that these children have been victimized by the inability, neglect or abuse of their heterosexual parents. These mothers and fathers are living proof that sexual orientation is not a reliable indicator of good parenting.

Our bishops are clear that gays and lesbians must be respected and not disparaged, and I know they mean it. The archbishop of San Francisco, regardless of his position on Prop. 8, means it. His first response to specific issues regarding gays and lesbians is always pastoral.

Brian Cahill is the former executive director of Catholic Charities in San Francisco.

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Comments

Comments (6)
  1. W E Bauer says - Posted: March 15, 2011

    The Catechism of the Catholic Church, which might be reviewed at any public library, states that homosexual behavior cannot in any way be approved.

    Individual attendees of Catholic churches may differ; however, their opinions, if different from the catechism, are not valid.

  2. DAVID DEWITT says - Posted: March 15, 2011

    A good way to discourage church attendance
    dis people who are a little different due to no fault of there own/ come on folks join the 21 century

  3. fpogen says - Posted: March 15, 2011

    What place does The Catechism of the Catholic Church have in a nation/state that is not Catholic?

  4. Janice Eastburn says - Posted: March 15, 2011

    Mr. Cahill: I salute you for your thoughtful, well reasoned letter. The prop 8 movement was strongly supported financially by both the Catholic and Mormon churches; all in a time when that money could have been used to support the hungry, homeless, and uninsured people of our society whose needs are many. Far too often the “debate” on this issue perseverates into religious ideology in a coutry which, supposedly, upholds the principle of separation of church and state. Marriage is a civil law issue and should be legislated as such. If a church does not sanction a marriage, that does not eliminate the legal right to get married nor should it. I am a lesbian in a stable, loving long-term relationship. I work, I pay my taxes, I obey the law, I vote, I do all the the things a citizen should do and, yet, I am denied a very basic legal right; one which should be enjoyed by any two consenting adults. Voices like yours, and so many others, will help reverse this discrimintory and unfair law. Thank you.

    Janice Eastburn

  5. fpogen says - Posted: March 16, 2011

    “The prop 8 movement was strongly supported financially by both the Catholic and Mormon churches; all in a time when that money could have been used to support the hungry, homeless, and uninsured people of our society whose needs are many. ”

    Everyone needs to read that again.

    The ideologies of many churches motivated them to divert money from helping those in need, to engage in political activity.
    The best thing that could happen is that the people, the congregation, that are the roots of all churches, tell those in power that their money should be spent to help people.

    Excuse me for going on a tangent…
    But every church that engages in political activity, financing anything political, should be taxed.

  6. grannylu says - Posted: March 16, 2011

    Thank you, Brian, for writing such a thoughtful article. Ahhh, society does seem to take such a long time to develop change. Hmmmm? Isn’t Christianity about love and understanding? “Judge not lest Ye be judged.” Sometimes CHRISTIAN churches of all kinds just forget that Jesus taught love and understanding and NOT a bunch of specific rules and criticisms……